At the beginning of the year my friend and I paid for a psychic reading, the woman was welcoming, genuine and knew things about me no one could ever guess, and she foresaw three big, important life events that would arrive by the end of August. The first was a course of study, which was funny because I had arranged to start an IT course that very morning, since then I have committed myself to earning a degree in English Lit. and am currently being assessed for an apprenticeship within the NHS. That's a lot of study; prediction one definitely came true.
The second important change was going to be a move - finally getting a house of my own. I was probably most excited for this one as my current home (my mother's home) holds a lot of bad memories and years of unhappiness that are difficult to forget. Unfortunately, though I tried to my hardest to make it happen, being unemployed and having severe bouts of emotional turbulence made me give up on any possibility of it happening. Then, on Tuesday this week, I received a visit from the local housing officer; within twenty minutes I had viewed the property and agreed to take it. Prediction number two came as a complete surprise.
Prediction number three is yet to arrive though I have been told it will be man-shaped, older and very good for me. He has less than three weeks to get here!
I spent a lot of time thinking about what the psychic told me and wondering how she didn't see my breakdown or the last four month's of recovery, but I have concluded that even if she had, she probably wouldn't have told me. I had to choose to change - it had to be my decision. I couldn't have been influenced by anyone but myself, yet if I hadn't made the choice to change, I never would have gotten anything she promised me. I would have never had the courage or self-belief to study for a degree or even apply for the position I have within the NHS and the very idea of living alone would have terrified me; I would have denied myself all these new, exciting opportunities and continued to waste my life, living in fear.
So, maybe the psychic put these ideas in my head and I created my own path to them, or maybe she saw that a breakthrough was on it's way for me. Either way, the universe is throwing a lot at me right now and I'm handling it, somehow. Everything is still a bit of a struggle but it's getting easier, slowly but surely, I'm retraining my mind to ignore the doubts and the negative thoughts and focus on the good stuff, though right now I'm so busy preparing to move I don't have time to dwell on my bad stuff.
This Bunny's Starting Again x
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